Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Reality Sets In....and a Really Cool Pavilion

The Pavilion












Part of "Old" Nanchang


"New" Nanchang in the distance






Suffice it to say, the honeymoon has ended. The past 24 hours have been pretty rough. Last night when it was time to put Rylie to bed, she completely lost it....full blown tantrum. It went on quite a while. She eventually passed out and slept well until the middle of the night when she started coughing a lot and felt a little warm. I gave her some Motrin and water, and she went back to sleep, although she was very restless. This morning she took a while to wake up, as usual, and we had a fairly uneventful breakfast. We headed across town to the Teng Wang Pavilion, and in the van, she started acting a little defiant, refusing to sit with Rush, just overall acting ugly if she didn't get exactly what she wanted.

Today starts the Mid-Autumn Festival and everyone is on holiday for the next 5 days. While we thought there were a ton of people everywhere before, today was crazier! As we drove and you could see down alleyways, each one was just packed. It was nuts!

The Pavilion was amazing. It has been rebuilt 28 times due to wars and other things, each time rebuilt in the style of the dynasty in power. There were many pieces of artwork inside....paintings, sculptures, mosaics....almost all of which told a legend of some type. Others showed landscape or history of Jiangxi Province. We saw a performance inside which included some dancing, singing and music representative of Tang history 1300 years ago. It was very interesting. The Pavilion was surrounded by beautiful gardens and butted right up to a river (I can't remember the name) which gave us great views of "new" Nanchang. They have a 10 year plan to basically build a new city, which almost seems like trying to rebuild all of lower Manhattan that time frame. I still don't really understand the concept....but it's happening nonetheless.

At the Pavilion, Rylie refused to walk or let Rush carry her. I was beat by the end of our tour from hauling her up and down stairs as she was occasionally crying and arching herself. I wanted to take her back to the hotel, but when you are with a group, it doesn't really work that way. Our guide took us to a local restaurant which I must say, was delicious and cheap, but I can't say I enjoyed a single minute of the time there. Rylie went ballistic. She screamed and arched and kicked and flailed the whole time. Nothing helped....not toys, not walking, not feeding (well, maybe for a minute or two), nothing. She was done. My biggest frustration came from everyone else trying to add their 2 cents to an already frustrating situation. Bottom line, she was exhausted, she didn't feel good, and she needed to get out of there. On top of that, I am certain that she was having some issues today emotionally. She has been with us for 3 days now, and I think reality is hitting her. I am certain even a little 21 month old can grieve their losses...on top of that, she has lost any and all control of her entire life. Add all of these up together, and it was a recipe for disaster.

Unfortunately, because she was still losing it in the van on the way back to the hotel, we were unable to visit her finding spot. I was so disappointed, because I want to be able to document it for her information down the road, but at the time, I couldn't justify doing anything but getting her in bed and away from all the overstimulation. I am praying that tomorrow we will be able to stop there and take some pictures. It would be so disappointing to miss that opportunity.

She took a good nap and woke up in a better mood. We have stayed in the hotel since we got back which has helped. She was very playful this evening, had her bath and now is sleeping. She was a little feisy at bedtime again, but nothing like last night and this morning.

I am glad she is showing us a little more of her true self. However it is very difficult to deal with a situation like today when you don't have a lot of control over things (i.e. leaving the restaurant) and other people are judging your actions. I am ready to be at home where I can call the shots and where my judgement is trusted because I am her mom. I could vent about this for a long time, because other things occurred and things in this culture are done so much differently, but I will spare you all the details. Bottom line, we were all glad to be in our room sheltered away for a bit.

The evening at least hit a high note when we were able to watch fireworks from our window....we cut off all the lights, hopped up in bed, and watched an awesome display over the skyline. Very cool.

Please pray for Rylie....overall for her adjustment and for her peace. Please pray that we would not get frustrated with the situation and that we would have tolerance for some of the things said to us. Also pray for her passport....there are some timing issues that need to be worked out for us to leave China as scheduled, which is an added stressor we hate to deal with at a time like this.
Thanks for all the messages and prayers.....we miss you all so much. We miss Jonah and Reagan like crazy, and we miss the good old USA in so many ways. This is not a journey for the faint of heart, that's for sure. Tomorrow's another day....




















9 comments:

  1. Hugs Jen. We'll be praying for you guys. Over stimulation is so tough to manage on your own turf, I can't imagine being in another country. Very cool about the fireworks though!

    ReplyDelete
  2. hang in there guys! i know you must be exhausted. continue to take in every moment of every experience -- the good and the less good. i sure hope you get the chance to visit the finding place. perhaps, if all else fails, at least one of you could maybe slip away in a taxi to go by quickly to take some photos for a keepsake. i'm really enjoying your blog posts. i'm so happy for you guys and wishing we were there with you. we'll be praying for your safety, passport issues, health, and adjustment.
    -Kevin

    ReplyDelete
  3. I found your blog on the agency stat chart, and I have so enjoyed following your adoption. We are going to get our 2 year old daughter in November or early December. We have adopted from China once before and I remember that feeling of, I just want to be on my own turf and then I can work my magic :) And it's so hard to be caught in a situation that you can't physically get out of :( sorry. Hang in there! Your daughter is just beautiful!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hang in there. My thoughts and prayers are with you. She reminds me sooooooooo much of Catherine and her rough transition. It will get better. . .just think of Catherine now days! I'll be thinking of you. Hugs and prayers. You will be home before you know it. Have a down day, if you can and get some rest. PS she looked really cute in her dress yesterday;). Hugs!!! It may not seem like it right now, but you are just the mommy and daddy this little girl needs!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hang in there. My thoughts and prayers are with you. She reminds me sooooooooo much of Catherine and her rough transition. It will get better. . .just think of Catherine now days! I'll be thinking of you. Hugs and prayers. You will be home before you know it. Have a down day, if you can and get some rest. PS she looked really cute in her dress yesterday;). Hugs!!! It may not seem like it right now, but you are just the mommy and daddy this little girl needs!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hang in there. My thoughts and prayers are with you. She reminds me sooooooooo much of Catherine and her rough transition. It will get better. . .just think of Catherine now days! I'll be thinking of you. Hugs and prayers. You will be home before you know it. Have a down day, if you can and get some rest. PS she looked really cute in her dress yesterday;). Hugs!!! It may not seem like it right now, but you are just the mommy and daddy this little girl needs!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Oh man! Dealing with tantrums, a language barrier, overstimulation, not being able to escape AND unkind words...I can't imagine. May God's grace flood you and Rush in the coming days and give Riley peace during her transition.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Thanks for the beautiful and candid blog! Your story brings tears to my eyes. Very precious. Hang in there - we will be praying for you guys. When we are weak, He is strong!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Thanks for the beautiful and candid blog! Your story brings tears to my eyes. Very precious. Hang in there - we will be praying for you guys. When we are weak, He is strong!

    ReplyDelete