Monday, August 27, 2012


"After the third kid people stop congratulating you.  
Then they just look at you like you are Amish."
-Jim Gaffigan

We can relate.  When people find out we have four kids their response is usually something along the lines of, "Really? Four?" or "Wow, that's a lot."

But more often than not I hear the following question: "So are you guys done?" Sometimes I can't tell if they are asking a question or pleading for us to stop.

We have to be done, right? With our income and in today's world it was borderline irresponsible to have four, much less five children.  We couldn't possibly afford more kids could we?  Besides, where would we put them?  We are still trying to figure out where to put Jude's bed for goodness sake.  Don't even get me started on how we are going to pay for college in the years to come.

We should really do the responsible thing and focus on the kids we already have.  But then again, whose definition of responsible I am using?  The world tells me that it's responsible to have a beautifully decorated home, nice cars, college savings for everyone, expensive hobbies, well invested retirement accounts and kids who excel in academics and sports.  If I can't give each kid their own room, own television, own smart phone, own computer, their own this & own that then it's pretty clear what I am: irresponsible.

It's not that any of those things are bad.  In fact, many are good.  But does checking everything off of that list make me responsible? Or wise? I am starting to think the answer to that question is a resounding "no".

No doubt, we all have a responsibly to provide for our families.  But an even greater responsibility exists to spread the Good News to the ends of the world and to reach those in need. The poor, the abandoned. The foreigner, the widow, the orphan.

I don't know what the future holds, but I know that my family isn't done.  I don't know if that means we will adopt more sons and daughters into our home.  It may.  But even if we don't we will never be done fighting for the millions of Rylies & Judes who are waiting.  Literally waiting to come home & waiting to hear the Gospel.

The more the world looks at my family and cries, "How irresponsible!" the more I'm convinced we are finally being responsible to the call that a Jewish carpenter made some 2,000 years ago.  


  1. It's Melissa from ppycz class. Shining your light means looking a little different than the rest of the world. :) Love this post. Love the picture of your family! (And it seems like you're doing THE responsible thing, to me!)

  2. Beautifully written! May we feature this on "We Are Grafted In"? Since you have contributed before, we can just use your bio and pic from before. Just let me know!
    co-administrator of WAGI
    smurphy 28 @ juno . com

  3. Love this post. Exactly some of the thoughts my hubby and I have had. We were always told we had the "perfect family" with one boy and one girl. It definitely stumped people when they heard we were adopting two more. And we aren't positive we'll be "done" after they come home; God knows that. :)